Just some thoughts from your everyday Mom....

It's time to put these wrestling thoughts on paper....

It's been about three months now that I finished Jen Hatmaker's book 7--An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess. If you want to be challenged and have your convictions explode at a high level, I recommend you read this book. I have a copy--borrow it anytime:) In this book, Jen, a normal Mom by everyday standards, takes a strong stand against all the stuff present in our lives. From food, to clothing, technology, money, and time, she doesn't miss a beat. Neither did I as I was reading it. Aside from this book, my personal time spent in the Word and in prayer, I am starting to circulate some thoughts, some convictions, and things I feel to be truth.

*Disclaimer: I am not perfect, nor do I claim to be. All these things are THOUGHTS. I wish I could say they are more than that right now. But they aren't. Well, maybe, barely (on a good day).
-I live in a 2,000 + square food home.
-We drive two decent looking (depending on who you ask) cars.
-Our total income exceeds $35,000 a year, so we are automatically in the top 4 percent of the world's wealthiest people.
-My attic is still FILLED with things...and I just went through it.
-My own clothing drawers and closets are teeming with clothes. So much so that for our entire family, I have to take keep summer/winter clothes in totes under the bed.
-My kids have too many toys. Period.
-We take two nice vacations each year.
-I check facebook every day and I eat ice cream once a week.
-We give to our church and to the poor, but not nearly enough.
--and the list could go on and on.

Okay, so here we go! I will touch on two major points in this entry and hope to finish the next two in another entry.

#1. In Luke Chapter 12, Jesus says, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.” 
Stuff: Jen Hatmaker did a little experiment. She counted all the articles of clothing and shoes (winter and summer) in her closet and counted around 300 things. Try it. You'll be surprised at how much you have. She counted belts, undies, and coats. Everything. If each item costs around $10 (some will be less, say, like socks, and some will be more, cute summer dress, running sneakers). That's nearly $3,000 just sitting in your CLOSEST! I challenged myself to weed/sort through clothes this Spring. I was horrified. Let's just say I'm no fashionista and would never buy anything not on sale. And let me just say, consignments shops, Kohls, and sometimes Target are the only places I shop. Yikes. How many articles of clothing do you have? Do you do the wash weekly? I think we all have more than enough clothing.

 I had a friend from church tell me this example. She and her husband are using their old silverware from college...banged up and in less than perfect condition. They have a brand new set hidden somewhere. She asked herself "Why do you need both?" And she wrestled with, "Okay, do I give the new set away or the old?" Such a great example! I have silverware in my attic that someone gave me when we first married (used). I hesitated to get rid of it because what if my kids need it some day when they move out (you know, in like twenty years from now)? Really Alli. That's ridiculous. What about taking with us camping? Again, ridiculous. Camping is hard enough--plastic is a necessity. At least to me. I rough it enough with a tent:)

How many toys do your kids have? How many dolls does a girl need? How do we make sure our kids don't feel entitled? You know, sometimes I just WANT to buy my kid something. That's not a horrible thing. For many people, we love showering those we love with gifts.  But enough is enough! Ask me this next Christmas, but Mitch and I really have a vision for next Christmas: something you can wear, something you can play with, something you can read, and somewhere you can go. There's other ideas reflecting the meaning of Christmas we came up with as well, but that was a big one. Ask me in December, if we followed through with it, but right now we are really excited about it. I seriously fear my children feeling like the are entitled to their every want and desire. Once you teeter into that realm, it's hard to go back! Let us give our kids endless amounts of love and time, not endless amounts of meaningless stuff.

Here's a practical challenge for you. Take one month, 4 weeks, 31 days, whatever, and committ to getting rid of 7 things each day. If this sounds ridiculously easy or really hard (maybe you've already plunged into decluttering), change the number. It's not the number the counts, but the motive behind it!

#2. Serving
1 Peter 4:10
In Peter Chapter 4, God commands, "Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms."
I know my "gift" right now needs to be focusing on being a good wife and a mother to my young children. I know this sounds silly in this day and age. I have a close friend, who knew that what she truly wanted in life was to be a "wife and a mother." Wow...nowadays that doesn't sound like much, but how truly selfless that is! I still hang onto my "title" as teacher because in some way that makes me feel a little more "successful" on paper? I don't know, I just need to stop that.

 God uses many verses in the bible commanding parents to raise children up in the way of the Word, to administer correction, and to teach them to love others. That is a HUGE responsibility and takes a great amount of time. The area of discipleship that I am trying to devote all my time to right now are my two babes. I want them to know and love Jesus and I want to know they will be with me in heaven. However, without going into a working Mom vs. stay-at-home conversation, children can turn out to be Christ followers without having their mother hovering over them 24/7. I think about in other cultures where the demands of physical work to survive do not enable a mother to be present all the time. Or a single mother who works two jobs to support her family. My sister-in-law is a working Mom and oh, my nephews are gems! This is soley my belief, but I think sometimes we hide behind "things" so that we don't have to serve. For instance, when my children get older, then I can serve. When I'm done driving my children around to all their activities, I'll serve. As soon as my aging parents don't need us anymore, then I'll serve. As soon as I'm retired, I'll serve. Umm... get my point? Just serve already!! It doesn't have to be big, it doesn't have to be elaborate, but when you hear of a need and know you can do it. Do it! I know of programs at our church that can't happen because there's no one to serve. It's easy in a big church to "hide" to fade away from the lime light. But c'mon, use your gifts. There was a Mom at a meeting I went to a few weeks ago regarding an upcoming church event, that has seven young girls at home! Praise God for her willing heart, sustained energy, and a husband that sees the value in serving.

I need to be careful not to overcommit. It's easy to do. Your family needs to come first. Period.
But sometimes I wonder, because I'm guilty of this, if we actually added up the time we spent with our kids, our husbands, in the Word, sleeping, cooking, cleaning, checking email/facebook, exercising, driving, shopping, watching TV, putting on our makeup and showering, if we would be shocked? Just another challenge. Disclaimer* I need to participate in these challenges too!

So in summary, I've been challenged by so much these past few months. Sometimes I love that, and sometimes I hate it! I tend to compare too much, worry more than I need too, and question my mothering instincts more than I should. But I'm blessed by an amazing, hard working husband, two adorable healthy kids, the best job ever (at least most days), an extended family who cares, and wonderful girlfriends to do life with (aka to stay sane with!). 

Yikes, has it really been almost a year since my last post? That is so discouraging, but at the same time, as a Mom of two small children, who babysits on the side, and is married to a teacher, it's easy to understand. My, much has happened during my ten month absence, so let me just give some highlights.

A few things I've learned over the year...
-Vacations are so much better when you have children!! Really, I mean that! Yes, when you have small, small children, they are not super relaxing, but last summer, watching Kinsey have so much fun, just brought back so many amazing memories for Mitch and I and the days of our childhood. It's like reliving them all over again. I know not all families can financially afford to take a vacation, but I promise you, it's a good investment. Not only are you making memories for your child and with your own family, but your extended family as well. Priceless.

-Parenting is so humbling. I mean, trying to convince a two-year-old to share, in front of a whole bunch of people, as she has the death grip on a favorite toy (or not so favorite toy), and turning red and trying to make excuses why she has trouble with this, is, well embarrassing!! I used to take her small imperfections as a reflection of our parenting. Are we not modeling enough? Does she see us do this? Do we play with kids who won't share? We've learned that unfortunately, there comes a day, when our little, perfect angels who only sleep, cry, and poop, develop--how can I say this--a personality? Some kids are laid back (lucky you!), some have trouble sharing and being kind, some are extremely strong-willed, some are sassy, and some are strubborn. And most are a combination of all of these. So...how are we fixing this sharing issue? No big secret--continued modeling of sharing, encouraging sharing, praising her when she does share, and our biggest ingredient--praying for a heart change!! We can see it already working:) I'm blessed not to have a strong-willed child, just one incredibly attached to possessions. Yikes! And Colin, hmmm...I guess time will tell.

-I get more showers on the weekends and evenings. Why? Well, Mitch is home. Showering during the day equals fear of what's happening outside the door, or a bathroom that is completely destroyed. I mean completely. Showering when someone else is home, makes it feel like an escape. Lock the door and let them knock. And knock. And knock. Singing loudly can tune some of that noise out.  Yes, when I'm in the bathroom and Mitch is home--I'm at Hershey Hotel and Spa for all I care!

-Grocery shopping at 10pm? It's just easier! As a night owl, it's worth it for me. And believe it or not, I'm not alone. There's a culture of us there at that time. We just smile and nod at each other as we get out our coupon books and calculator. Fill our carts with the healthiest foods we can find for under $5 and some fruit snacks and lollipops to stuff in diaper bags for emergencies. Date night ice cream that we pull out after the kids get in  bed is stashed in there too.

-So...what was harder? Going from zero to one or from one to two? I get this question a lot. To be honest, going from zero to one was so much fun (hard fun) that I don't really think about it as difficult. You don't know what to expect, so you have no expectations. Going from one to two wasn't too bad because you are still, as one friend refers it, man to man defense. A Sunday morning usually looks like this, "Okay, you got Kins? Okay, I got Colin's shoes...yadda yadda." I have heard, though, going from two to three can put you over the edge. Ha!

-Five years into your marriage, your man should still be the number one priority (other than Jesus) in your life. Sometimes it's hard to put each other as a top priority, and I wish I could type here that I do that absolutely, 100 percent of the time. The days can be long and the last thing on your mind is making sure you are meeting his needs. However, when Mitch and I meet each others needs (and how different they are!), the unity between us continues to grow, mature, and develop in ways I would have never thought on the day we said, "I do." Of course, I have to say, I'm a pretty lucky lady because Mitch is a pretty good guy! He makes it easy for me to meet his needs. Sorry, it's my blog and I love bragging about him!

-That I have the cutest kids in the world and the smartest. Obviously! Only a parent can love and appreciate the funny, quirky, weird gibberish they say. That Kinsey needs both blankies, a cup of water, baby Megan, a pile high of books at the bottom of the bed, and bear night light on before she falls asleep (typing this makes me think this is borderline ridiculous)!  How Colin has to be turned just the right way when we lay him in his crib so he falls asleep. When making ridiculous faces makes them laugh so hard, you find yourself doing it over and over just to hear those baby giggles and praying no one walks in to see you in the weirdest position ever with your hair flipped upside down! Being up in a smoldering hot attic digging out an old train JUST because someone is begging to play with it.  I hope this doesn't make me sound like a pushover parent. I do set limits and no is used plenty at this house, but I just love seeing my kids happy. No one can argue with that!

-Finally, and most importantly, thank goodness for the grace the Lord Jesus gives us! I think he gives an extra special amount of grace to us Moms:) Last night at my brother-in-laws graduation from Kingdom Ministry School, he gave a keynote address. In it, he said this: I never thought I was a leader. I just didn't think I had the leadership qualities to pursue a vision in this area. But as I heard one of our teachers pray, I realize that I can use the leadership qualities that God did give me, and ask Him to equip me with the rest." WOW!!! How selfish is it to think that God can't and won't make us leaders, visionaries, devoted spouses, great Moms, and a Proverbs 31 Women. I grew up with someone in my life saying "this is just the way I am" all the time. NO, God can equip us with much more than that and can transform negative qualities when you are ready to start confessing them. Start praying for Him to give you what you think you lack-- o accomplish something you fell led to accomplish! Thanks for reading!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

I blinked and they're all grown up...

I can't tell you how many times a week, I hear someone tell me that. They'll smile and ask "How old are your children?" Then nostalgically say something like, "Oh, enjoy it, those years go bye too fast," or "they grow up too quickly" or "I remember those great years."  I just want to scream "I get it!! I know!!" I'm trying to savor it all. Every moment. I really am. I'm trying to capture every memory in photographs, on paper, and most importantly in my heart. A friend and I said the other day how we both sometimes feel "stressed" about enjoying this time:)  I just look at Kinsey (2 yrs) and Colin (3 months), and I truly want them to stay this age forever! It's so much work, there are many frustrating moments, many discouraging and tired days, but I truly love being a Mommy to these two babies. I get asked all the time if I'm planning on sending Kinsey to nursery school soon. I try not to look too shocked, but she's only 2!! I'm holding onto her as long as I can. Maybe I won't be saying that in a few years, but that's how I feel now.

God has given me the greatest blessing I could ever ask for: being able to stay home with my kids. I want to clarify that I don't think "it's the best thing for every family!" Trust me, I really, really want to reiterate that. Kids everywhere are thriving with working parents. I look at my three nephews who have two hardworking parents and they are all three incredibly kind, hardworking, and balanced. There are many, many things we won't be able to give our children; there are many things we'll do without. My kids will probably miss out on some opportunities that they might have otherwise have. BUT, God is good, and for our family, this is what we wanted and we're making it work. It's just really neat to see how God has provided for us. From babysitting, tutoring, Mitch painting, summer school, paying off school loans, and cutting back on non-essentials, gives us all we need to live within our means and comfortably:) I do wish we didn't like to eat out so much--definitely, our weekend enjoyment.

Sometimes before I go to bed, I look over at Mitch, and say, "thank you for letting me stay home with our kids. Thank you for letting me have my dream job, and the best job in the world." After being away from Kinsey that first year and knowing what leaving her was like (just ask Grandma's and 'Momma Nolt'), I can now be so thankful for what I have. Just this morning, after 8:30, I walked into Kinsey's room. She was awake, sitting in nothing but a diaper (at least she kept that on for once), quietly reading (she does this a couple of times a week). I asked her what she was doing, and she said, "Reading my bible, Mommy. Look. See Noah?" My heart melted:) Then she'll ask, "Where Daddy are?" When I tell her he's working, she says, "Oh, Daddy teacher. Be home later." Then she runs over to her dresser for her favorite part of the day--picking out her clothes! Who's kid is this? Her Momma is not a fashionista... After a big bowl of oatmeal with raisins (my clone), it's off to play or off to a playdate. It's just, as one of her favorite books says, "Fun all day!"

As for Colin, my favorite part of my day with him is morning. After his belly is full (and yes, it takes a long time fill that tank!), I prop him up and he smiles and coos and just stares at me. And I star back. No big sister in his face, no distractions. Just me and him. We'll do this for the longest time, and I cherish it. He's such a good baby. Falls asleep on his own, loves his nuk, smiles as McKinsey (most of the time), and takes "big comments" from strangers like a champ. "How old is your baby?" "Three months." "Wow, he's huge." "Yes, he's healthy. Thanks for noticing:)" His pediatrician called him the Michelin  baby--I just call him my chunker:)

Wow--life with two kids. Lots of fun. Life with a devoted, loving husband and father, more fun.
In a couple of days, Mitch and I will celebrate our four years of marriage:) I just love him even more than on our wedding day. Marriage takes work, communication, forgiveness, laughter, and love, but when you've found the right person--totally worth it:) God has blessed us much.
 
James 1:12
Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life, which the Lord has promised to those who love Him
 

Our Family Has Grown! Colin's Birth Story

I am excited to announce the birth of our son, Colin Mitchell Swords, born April 30th. He was a BIG BOY. Almost two weeks late, he measured in at 9 pounds 5 ounces and 20.5 inches long. Here is his birth story...

I felt very strongly that I wanted to try for a VBAC (Vaginal delivery after C-Section). Looking back on the events of my labor with McKinsey there were many things I would have done differently if I had been more informed and I didn't want to have any regrets this time around. I equipped myself for success. I bought and borrowed every book I could get my hands on about VBACs and labor in general. I learned a lot, more than I ever did during my first pregnancy, and loved soaking in all the knowledge and material. I changed hospitals and providers at 32 weeks. I wanted this more than anything and I wanted to have every possible advantage I could. The main reason I switched doctors was because my current OB was not supportive of a vbac. She said she would let me "try" but that I couldn't go late. If I went past my due date, I would have to have a C-Section. Also, Women and Babies, where I'd deliver if very drug happy and I wanted to avoid drugs if I could. Finally, the practice was so large that I would never know who would be on duty and how supportive they would be of my desire to VBAC. After much prayer and deliberation, Mitch and I decided to switch to Birth Care, a midwifery center in southern PA. They work with a lot of people in the Amish/Mennonite community and attend a lot of home births. They were very supportive of me, my case, and wanted to help me try to have a VBAC. They, of course, couldn't promise anything, but they wanted to help me try. I would deliver at Ephrata Hospital and I would have the doctors at Ephrata OBGYN oversee my delivery in case I needed a C-Section. I was happy. Mitch was happy. We prayed and hoped for the best.

Then my due date rolled around. And then a week after my due date pasted. Then eleven days after my due date came and went. I was told that I would be allowed to wait until 42 weeks, and then they would have to perform the C-Section. I was devastated. I knew that every day this little guy was late, he was getting bigger. At 35 weeks, my ultrasound showed a small baby for his age, and I was so encouraged. But I knew that with each day, my chances of having a VBAC were narrowing. I was feeling extra sorry for myself and each night before going to bed, I would be so sad, knowing that another day without meeting my bundle.

However, God is GOOD! In this wait, I learned many things about myself and about patience. About a week past my due date, I talked with a neighbor across the street. One of the most humbling experiences of my life. She asked me how I was feeling and I smiled and said, "hanging in there." She, without any bitterness or sadness in her voice, told me that her son's doctor's just confirmed what they already knew, her son would be a Little Person in life. He would have to wear braces on his legs for quite some time, and won't walk for a long time after that. What makes the story even sadder is that this couple had been trying to conceive for several years. Finally, after at least one miscarriage, they found out they were pregnant. Now this... I went inside after talking to her and just sobbed. How impatient, how selfish I had been. I had a seemingly healthy boy in my belly and all I can think about is how big, hot, and pregnant I was. God reminded me that waiting isn't so bad.

I also realized that I had been approaching Colin's birth with pridefulness in my heart. I wanted a VBAC, I wanted a labor without drugs, I wanted everything to go perfectly, just like in the books I read. Me, me, me! We prayed about this decision, but I know unconscienscly I prayed a bit too much for the desires of my heart and not enough for the trust of God's will and HIS plan for this baby.  It wasn't until after Colin's birth that I realized the fullness of these feelings and my actions.

So...the outcome? I finally went into labor 12 days past my due date, on a Sunday afternoon. We took Kinsey to the park, had an awful meal at Freeze and Frizz, and started timing contractions around 7:30 that evening. They were fast and coming, but not very painful. They didn't get too painful until around 10pm, at which point, I headed to the shower for some relief. After about 30 minutes, my water broke! I had just been saying to Mitch that I didn't want to get to the hospital too early, and that I wanted to hold on as long as possible. Well, after my water broke, my contractions became so incredibly painful. I never experienced pain like that with McKinsey!!! I then preceded to tell Mitch (or yell) that we had "waited too long!" My Mom was called over and we left for Ephrata. I think we made it in about 15 minutes---yikes!

When we got there, I was only about 6cm, to my dismay. I thought surely I'd be at 10 with this pain:) I labored for a couple more hours before requesting an epidural. I felt this urge to push, and wasn't ready too, therefore, my cervix started swelling, which wasn't good. To my surprise, my midwife even agreed with my decision. We got some sleep, and with much encouragement, around 6am the next morning, I was at 10!!!!! I was beyond excited! However, my excitement started to fade, when my contractions started coming back (my epidural had worn off), and I was having intense back pain. I managed to push for 2.5 hours, but the back labor was getting unbearable. The little guy, who had been in position all along, had turned over, posterier, which makes fitting much more difficult. The doctors were called in and a C-Section was recommended. I remember looking over at Mitch, my eyes filling with tears, as I nodded. I knew I had done my best, but he just wasn't going to fit. It still hit me like a ton of bricks, but I knew I was going to soon meet my little miracle.

There was one more needle in the haystack. I had developed a fever during labor. From the epidural? An infection? Who knows... However, because of this, they told me that Colin would have to be in the NICU for 48 hours after birth for observation. This was more of a blow than the c-section. I almost remembering thinking that that couldn't be possible...I was dreaming. I would not be separated from my baby. No way. However, that is exactly what happened. I barely got to hold him after surgery, and he was whisked away almost immediately. I demanded nursing him two hours after surgery and they basically told me I was nuts. They also encouraged me to give him formula that night, so I could "rest." I made them wheel me into the NICU every 3 hours to feed him, all night long, until I could walk. They seemed so surprised, but I was a Mommy on a mission!!

Long story short, he was just fine. He nursed like a champ right from the beginning, and came back with me 48 hours later. Longest 48 hours of my life! But he was healthy, and happy and that's all that mattered! My little boy had finally arrived...

Another New Season

Wow! I can't believe it's been since July since I've last posted. Wasn't staying home supposed to give me more time? Ha! What a true blessing staying home with Kinsey has been. Not that it's always easy or the days always go by fast, but I couldn't imagine my life any different than it is right now. I wake up with Kinsey after a restful night (she's a great sleeper at night), and the mornings are filled with activities, outings with other Moms, and time at home playing. One time a couple of weeks ago, I was driving the same route that I did when I was working. I looked back at that precious face, and had a flashback to last year. Most mornings, I would be so upset leaving her, that I would constantly turn around while driving to talk or sing or to make her laugh. It was like I didn't want to waste ANY time I had. I can't believe I never got in an accident. I started tearing up thinking about this during my drive in present day and just prayed to God thanking Him for leading us to this decision, for my husband's wholehearted support, for finances, and for His continued faithfulness in our decision.

Kinsey is just at the perfect age (19 months)--in my opinion--thus far! I love it! She's communicating more and our "conversations" are precious. She says "Mommy" first thing every morning from her crib and it makes getting up to get her so easy. She definitely loves to test limits, but I feel better equipped than I did a few months ago to know when she's being a trickster and when's she not. That is not to mean that I have it all together or that Mitch and I are the best disciplinarians in the world!!!!! I feel like I have so much to learn and know that I will have to learn as I go and pray for God's wisdom. I really like the Love and Logic approach to discipline, but I constantly question myself! I'm so thankful that Mitch and I are on the same page with parenting:)

So, the biggest news, is the announcement of a new addition to our family come April! We are so excited to add to our family and can't wait to meet this precious little gift. And a gift it truly is. One thing I have learned since becoming a Mommy is to never take getting pregnant for granted, and never "brag" or act as though you are "fertile myrtle." I won't say too much on this, but I will say that I have learned to be joyful in this pregnancy, this gift, and that many are still waiting for this blessing. This has been a burden on my heart and I'm not sure why. I will continue to pray for strength and encouragement for my friends who patiently wait on the Lord.

Until next time....

My Next Chapter...Change is GOOD!

Well, it's now JULY, and it has been almost six months since my last post. And a lot has happened since then. Most notably, was our huge decision for me to stay home with McKinsey. I have been looking for the letter that I handed out to the staff and my friends, and if I ever find it, I'll post it on here. In short, it was the hardest decision to make, yet knowing it was the right one for our family, made it easy. Does that make sense? I have such joy knowing that I don't have to dread September, and I feel so blessed that I am able to stay home. Mitch has been such a encouragement and is so excited to see me stay home. I was talking to a good friend one night about my decision, and she said, "Well, how does Mitch feel about all this?" I looked at her and said, "Oh, he wants to me to stay home." Surprised, she looked at me, and said, "Really? I thought that's why you are here. To tell me you were in disagreement!"

God has been blessing this decision in big ways and little ways. Here's a few:
He has given Mitch and I both summer jobs that will will help us financially. I am tutoring and watching two little boys for the summer and Mitch has been teaching summer school and will be painting. We were given boxes of clothes and toys from friends and parents of my students that will hold us for the next five years! We were given some bags of mulch from a friend who had extra, and have had people offer to watch Kinsey for us if we ever wanted to go out. We even had a close friend give us a year's subscription to Hands-On-House! We just know we will continue to be blessed!

Being home with Kinsey this summer has been amazing. Just watching this little girl, has opened my eyes, to a child's world. For instance, as we were coming down the stairs this evening, and Kinsey saw a rainbow of light on the wall. We must have sat there for five minutes as she examined it, tried to touch it, and made shadows over it with her hands. I wouldn't have even thought twice if I had been coming down the stairs myself. At the park, she stooped down for a couple of minutes to stare at and smell the flowers (got her Grandma's love of flowers that's for sure!). Such innocence. Of course, she wasn't innocent when she threw mulch all over the train at the park and then tried to eat it! Discipline at this age seems hard and Mitch and I often think we are just guessing at it and trying our best. I guess the first one is a learning experience and we can only hope and pray that what we are doing is right and we are creating a sweet, little girl, who loves Jesus with all her heart. It's exciting and scary to think we are molding this small little person! What a challenge God has given us!!! We know we will make mistakes and do things differently next time around, but for right now, we are doing the best we can! It seems as though we now finally have a routine and we are finally off the bottle! I know that once this gets comfortable, she will change, but for now, I'm loving it!

One thing we do know for sure is Mommy and Daddy need a break from time to time! We are very careful as a couple to "get-away" and are fortunate to have babysitters available to us! When you have kids, it's easy to make it all about them, but we know that our alone time is critical to maintaining a good marriage! We definitely look forward to our nights out!!!

That's all for now!

Kinsey is 10 Months!

My little one is taking steps! She took 10 steps on February 1st, a snow day, and her Daddy's 25th birthday! It was a special day indeed--and Mommy was home to see it! HOORAY! This month also marks the first ear infection and significant cold she's caught. I, of course, brought it home to her. Boo. She's teething like crazy--6 teeth now, and got another bout of diaper rash. She's having a rough time! She is babbling and gurgling, loves making funny faces, and can put things in a box, take them out, hand them to you, and put them back in the box. She can roll a ball to you, and laughs when you make funny faces as her. Currently, she likes rolling her umbrella stroller back and forth in the house. She is a great eater. Among her more unusual foods includes: avocados, tofu, kiwi, and Daddy's homemade French Bread. She tries most things--I hope that continues!

Yes, I still tear up dropping her off at her caregivers' some mornings. Don't get me wrong, she loves all her caregivers and doesn't seem the least bit fazed that I'm leaving. She knows it's just a part of the day now. Last week was particularly rough since she wasn't feeling well. Some mornings when that alarm goes off, I wonder how I am going to get up, get myself ready, wake her up, feed her, get her ready, go downstairs get ourselves both breakfast, load the bags in the car, get her loaded in the car, drop her off, say good-bye, leave her, then head to work myself, prepare for the day, and greet 23 smiling 7-year-olds. But I always do it and it's not so bad. And most people in the world, have FAR MORE challenging mornings than that, so my complaining ends right here.

I do hope God has a plan for next year. I have decided to stop trying to open doors myself and let him open them for me. I know he will. I just need to be patient and keep praying. I have such a beautiful family. I am so blessed.